Accessing Our Will: A Family Constellations Exercise
My recent weekly newsletter article explored the well of fear we may have when it comes to choosing sides and taking a stand, and how it can hold us back from doing so. There I referred to how looking at this realm through the lens of family constellations may bring additional illumination.
Here I wanted to share how to weave in this work.
If asserting yourself in alignment with what you believe in feels triggering, you may want to see if there is any ancestral tie-in that is stifling your free expression.
In doing so, you can reflect upon questions such as:
Did any living or deceased family member/s strongly take a position on something and subsequently experience negative impacts?
How has their story influenced how my family views them?
Do I feel an alignment to their character and/or their suffering?
How would I describe my family’s relationship to owning and acting upon their will? Their anger? How they deal with frustration? How/if they champion for what they desire?
See if these inquiries result in any unexpected realizations including new patterns of understanding that emerge. If you recognize that there was resultant harm by a family member owing to their taking a stand, consider whether it’s possible that this could be impacting you on a subconscious level.
If so, you can do a short exercise. Holding your family member or ancestor in your mind’s eye, tell them that you recognize their desire and the action that they took and have compassion for the consequences they experienced. Then acknowledge that this was their life, which unfolded uniquely to them. In doing so, gain a glimpse that just because they experienced negative impacts from taking action doesn’t mean that you will. Their life was theirs, and yours is yours.
Release the threads that may be tethering you to their suffering, and/or the suffering that they caused to others, so that you can free yourself. In doing so, you may then find yourself feeling differently, moving differently, and being in a different relationship with the things you desire and the choices you can make to act upon attaining them. This can help you forge a new alliance with yourself and other people, allowing you to marshal the depth of what galvanizes your spirit, finding more freedom and joy to take action and advocate on the behalf of what it is that you are passionate about.
P.S. If you’d like to learn more about my family constellations work, please send me a note and we can explore the benefits it can offer you.